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Ionie Scott
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Ionie Scott   My Press Releases

The Verbally Abusive Relationship

Published on 7/3/2019
For additional information  Click Here

Verbal abuse is a kind of battering which doesn't leave evidence comparable to the bruises of physical battering.  It can be just as painful, and recovery can take much longer.  The victim of abuse lives in a gradually more confusing realm.  In public, she is with one man, in private he may become another.  Subtle diminishing or angry outbursts, cool indifference or one-upmanship, witty sarcasm or silent withholding, manipulative coercion or unreasonable demands are common occurrences.  They are, however, cloaked in a "what's wrong with you, making a big thing out of nothing" attitude, and many, many other forms of denial.  Often, for the verbally abused woman, there is no other witness to her reality and no one who can understand her experience.  Friends and family may see the abuser as a really nice guy and, certainly, he sees himself as one.

If you have been the victim of verbal abuse if you have searched your soul for answers to the questions of how you can say things so he will understand, how is it that you hear what he says he never said, or how is it that you feel what he says you shouldn't feel, you may have been led to believe that there is something basically wrong with your ability to communicate, or with your perceptions, or feelings.

The effects of verbal abuse are primarily qualitative.  That is, they cannot be seen as the effects of physical abuse.  There are no physical signs of injury, no bruises, black eyes, or broken bones.  The intensity of anguish which the victim suffers determines the extent of the injury.  The quality of the experience of the victim defines the degree of abuse.

 

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