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Arun Jayakaran
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Arun Jayakaran   My Press Releases

Why are marriages not made in heaven?

Published on 6/8/2012
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What is marriage? Various definitions are available to explain marriage, like a bond, social contract, union, relationship recognized by law etc. All the above are book definitions of marriage, but in my opinion marriage is ‘A merger of mind and body between two consenting adults for a lifetime relationship’. At this point the definition of relationship plays a pivotal role in my definition. I particularly like the explanation by Dr. Dan Ardebili. “If you break down the word Re-la-tion-ship: Taking a journey on a ship with your partner and learning how to relate to one another. It is a journey to relate or learn from each other and from everything around you. You are taking this life journey together, creating magic moments and working through the hard or tough times, and most importantly growing stronger together”. So it is a life long journey as defined and expected by society and planned by God. But how many of us actually fulfill these obligations. A marriage is supposed to create lifetime magic moments, but sadly no longer. Divorces are on the rise, separations are common, extra marital affairs are now in fashion. These trends are disturbing and the sacred marriage concept is in danger. We now have ‘live in relationships, children out of wedlock, single parent etc. things which were literally unheard of decades ago. Today lots of marriages are besotted with numerous issues. Why does this happen? Are there solutions in sight? Is there a foolproof formula to prevent failures? Is it possible for two individuals to give a lifelong commitment to each other? Can they learn to sacrifice and compromise for a life time? Can the passion be kept alive for a long period? Well two individuals who sometimes till a year back were complete strangers suddenly find themselves living together, sharing, answerable to each other etc. This could become a shock factor once the initial euphoria is over. Until each partner loves the other more than himself or herself no marriage will be a successful. Give each other their individual space and respect each other are the other factors which could help a marriage become stronger. We grew up hearing the phrase “Marriages are made in heaven”, a phrase no doubt created by man to appease doubting individuals about marriage. But in today’s scenario how relevant is it? The more we think about it we realize that the fact of the matter is that ‘Marriages may not be made in heaven’ God created the concept of marriage with a purpose in mind, have we fulfilled his expectations? A question we should ask ourselves.
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